Rylee’s Story

What am I going to do? That is the only thought that echoes through my mind. He just dropped me off, and I didn’t even have an address to give him. I didn’t want to be in a relationship with him anymore, but I also had nowhere else to go. He caught on, and then he put me out. I am alone on the streets of Kansas City, in a bad part of town. I have no money. I was the only one working, and I did the best that I could, but the bills just kept piling up. And then the orange paper on my door appeared. I had a job I liked, but I can’t make it into work anymore. In fact, I can’t go anywhere without vomiting. On top of everything, I’m pregnant. 

There is so much that feels wrong in my life. Nothing is settled. I don’t know what tomorrow will look like. Despite that, I am committed to this little life growing inside of me. I love you, and I will find a way to take care of you, I promise my baby. I’m at such a low point in my life, yet I am overjoyed to be carrying my child.

With nowhere else to go, I sit on a curb and start searching for options on my phone. Each blue link is a potential lifeline. One by one, they turn purple, and I start to lose hope. Every shelter that I call is already full. I keep calling, keep trying, because I don’t have another choice. I am scared, and I have to stay safe for this baby. 

“Mother’s Refuge, how can I help you?” 

And just like that, my life has changed. This morning, I did not know where I was going to sleep tonight, now I have a warm bed and food. I can take a shower. I can breathe again. We’re going to be okay. That echo in my mind starts to quiet, and I can rest again. 

At first, it’s hard for me to believe that these people want to help me. I am so used to being used. There’s always a catch. But they help set up transportation for my OB appointments. They ask to see my ultrasounds, and it’s nice to have someone who is excited for me. It’s a girl, by the way. You are my daughter! I want to cry out to the world. 

I’m starting to get my life on track. A nice volunteer helped me practice for my driving test. I didn’t have the paperwork that I needed to get my license, and she even helped me get that too. I have a part time job, and I’m starting to save a little bit of money. I’m most proud of myself for enrolling in GED classes. I have passed four out of the five tests that I need in order to graduate. It’s taking time, but I know that I can do it. I will do it for you, baby girl. 

I’m learning a lot. We have classes here all the time. About money, relationships, pregnancy, parenting. There are other girls here, too, and they are just like me. We are all young moms, just trying to learn and figure things out. Some already have their babies, and some are still pregnant, like me. Sometimes that echo comes back, and I think what am I going to do? Now, I don’t have to process that alone. There are people here that I can talk to, and they listen. They actually try to understand where I am coming from, and that is new for me. 

Finally, after what seems like forever, my contractions start, and they do not stop. There is someone prepared and ready to take me to the hospital. Suddenly, I am holding her, my whole world, in my arms. You saved me, I think as I hold her. In a few days, we will get to go home. We have a home. 

Based on an interview with resident Rylee